It's 19 months on July 10th,2011

Today, my great special day, 19th months anniversary. Syukur Alhamdulliah with all love and bless in our relationship. Hope this will last forver. Love you baby!
hugs!!!

Planning Onwards

While sitting in front of cashier, come across the planning... yeahh planning for future ahead. What will I do in coming next 4 or 5 years from now.. what am I doing, will I still stay with future hubby ** that time confirm la da kawen kan.. hiks...** or we'll far apart cause I have great passion to further Master, Msc. abroad after finish my degree ** (2 years more), will I have kids at that time or struggling to complete the PhD ahead**(dream!!!) ... hahhhhh all the planning have to put in one straight path so that they'll keep in the path and not going missing apart!

For now, I have to complete my degree first.Alasss... to complete it, very teach me how tough and hard study is. Yes, its really hard, to gain knowledge and able to apply whatever we learn directly or indirectly backwards of years or semesters we had before. Instead of having distractions like passion, responsibility and commitment towards studies and college activities are just enough to make me plan the things-to-do very wisely, or else I'm gonna lie myself on a bed and crying for all the mistakes I've done before! Seriously there are too many, but I still learn and learn ... manage everything without forget my priority to study 1st and love 2nd!



My goodnesss... the love comes 1st I realize lately since I am so excited to think about marriage at this early age. At first, both my parents urge me to finish study 1st, but SURPRISINGLY they pass me a "green-light" to marry the one who I love most, InsyaAllah... The rest, they ask me to think and arrange properly. I wish I won't make a MISTAKE.. perhaps neglect my priority and dream which I want to further my study until I have a scroll of Master (at least) and doctorate,PhD before my age of 30! Yeahh I just can plan what should I do is to struggle on it and let to Allah S.W.T the rest, InsyaAllah

So.. now its time for me to think about my current study and marriage soon! hehe...
May Allah eases our plan ahead I pray.

If and only if I get married before the I finish my degree, I'll work hard and focus more to my spouse and study! That's my promise to myself... Yes I will and have to... Please pray for my bless and success in future undertaking guys!

salam :)

Blogging

hey, here is my little dirt secret to share with the readers... if you guys realize what i write **typing actually** here, i mostly write about me, myself... and my world, what happen to me...and yes all the activities I've done and in making. Meaning here, its simply known "virtual diary". Seriously, I mean.

Therefore, I wish not more people reading my entries unless just to share their opinion, anticipations. Sharing the experience I will consider it and most welcome. Critics also are most welcomes cause people on earth have still do mistakes purposely or impurposely right. So,just feel free to let me knows.

Next is the LESS is BETTER, cause I prefer silence rather than voicing out your ideas and critics about others yet he or she don't get the point and return what they doing so. In fact, talking about others in their own blog making much rumors which I think I hate controversies! So the best way is just do my own stuffs, just in case to make new friends to me, I will probably pleased to...

Another fact is I don't like high peaking traffic, yeahhh in reality there's certain people run for the traffic... I know it might be a very helpful way in order to make others realize your presence in blogging world and success your own business in case perhaps. Making others impressed with how good you are, no matter what... haha this is not me.. I prefer SILENCE indeed!

So, jump to the conclusion. I make my blog as my diary... I write most about my life and my performance. So, do not follow if you guys want me to follow back. I less interest with those "traffic-b.victim". I repeat I just blogging about my life...toodles!

A wordless Thursday

Nothing much to say. It's just a great thankful because everything is finally done. I'm done with P.A stuff... still got time to have short chatting with him which like his master students were not aroudn in lab. Second, grate that Dr. has given up the attendance percentage up to 80%. Alhamdulliah... (Baik juga Dr. nih..), third is am done with all the letters and all the secretary's stuffs . It's like I've settled down all the distractions I messed before. Fortunately, all the subjects are now can be sited for upcoming final exams. I also glad that could help couples of friends indeed! Everything happens for a reason I guess. Now, it's time to focus on my study, especially chemistry and genetic. They both still need to put more on struggle or else i'll regret soon. I wish that everyone is blessed in their preparation along this study week. Aminnn...

"If we put everything we want in right plan,

insyaAllah the whole universe will help us to strive for what we want"

Im not a girl with beautiful words...

I realized sometimes people tend to caught with beautiful words that his/her couple say to. Unfortunately, I'm not one of them. Still, I'm glad because to me beautiful words are not practical. Yeah I admit that it's one of the way how we show good feel or even romantic towards the people we love. It's not only the words, it's all about the meaning you have in those words. Sometimes, a situation might be like this a boy/girl talk everything nicely, the words he/she used might attract the couples at first they get to know each other. Then this bubbly love feeling will appears on when the words have whining up their mind on the person they love. I swear this is true. I've seen this happened before. It's just like a seduction unintentionally I guess. I was like to vomit off to those who has the intent like this. Ewww.... come on dear. Just be nice and straight forward. It will be easier I think. Maybe sometimes, we still need such romantic and beautiful words for certain special days and event. But please don't overuse the words or else you play around and being fake to the person that you love. Just be yourself and treat him/her like we're in his/her league.

a wonderful gathering and laughter break the serenity, harmony fellas

Tonight is indescribable. A wordless thought. I'll gonna miss their laughter and smiles. Our bonding have made us desclaimed ad sisters and brothers. We're just like family. A big happy family of 26 members. All good and bad things we faced together. I first thought this night would be the last night to us to known as a team. Forunately, we still have few days, hours.. minutes and seconds... For all we had done is all about how friendship play part among us. Nonetheless, there's still bad and good things we had. It's all about knowledge we gain my dear. May us still keep such bless and good bonding until we're graduated one day. All I wish is all the best to all my fellow friends; brothers and sisters, you guys are just like my angels. I really love sayangs! I won't forget for what we've gone through all long way in these 2 semesters. Friendship forever! LOVE YOU GUYS!!!

P/s: Specially dedicated to High Fifth College Representative Students Council, UPM Session 2010/2011

-Majlis Tertinggi Mahasiswa Kolej Kelima, UPM 2010/2011-

when daughters gather with momma ...

It's a long time we didn't time playing and talking together. I miss all the moment we had together when I was 15. It's true that when the age reaches "teen" thirteen, fourteen, fifteen and so on.. we'll face sweet moments and learn the new phase of becoming of sweet teenager. My time has passed... and now my 2 sweet and stubble lil sisters, Qila and baby. One is 14 and another is 16 y/o. We meet rarely because my hometown is in Perak. There'll be a chance to meet on weekends, if mom needs to go for looking new stocks of office attire and stop by nanny's house later. Luckily we're just around in KL. Today is a good and nice Saturday I have I guess. Many funny things and good things,news happened today! First thing first, my sisters mingle with me and lying together on a bed and have joking. I scream loudly and teasing them! Haha... I give special thing to make them tumbling and shouting for help. Then, mom came in the room. She asked what happened earlier? They quickly pointed to me. Well, I guess I did it impurposely! and... finally mom decides to JOIN the club! waaaaa... 4 persons stucked compactly on a bed. How awesome was it. We have girl talk.. and Gossip all around! hehee... mom, seriously I miss all the moments when I're in high school!! Now, my two sisters facing it. It's nice to a grown big girl guys! Everything you put as secrets you can share with your mom. You can also talk about hot and cute guys in schools with your mom until one they you get caught that you falling for "him". heheh Bitting nails... ermm... but now I just can wish to rotate time. I've entered matric and now Im a uni's student. Of course everything is changes according time. Perception also gain to be more matured. I enjoy talking to my sisters. Perhaps, it's normal!

Now life is totally different. The issue to discuss in current is about marriage! What a fast time pass by dear... OMG, there's a lot things to be considered about marriage. Mom did always ask me are you sure want to marry "A". The answer is of course he'll be the one I 'm gonna marry and live together afterward... and now it's only few months left to prepare for our engagement! List-to-do must already have and I'll working harder honey and make sure everything is going smoothly.

p/s: mom, if I can turn time back to past time before, I wish I could spend more time with you! I love you mom!

No sulk anymore... hehe

Alhamdulillah... I'm pleased and glad that my dad has just arrived Malaysia safely. I could see him change in look with bald head. Actually he just finished Umrah. Great grate i wish. He finally arrived nanny's home where he wished to meet all his kids here... I just talked to him like nothing happened before .. yeaaa lah... yesterday I got sulked instantly and I don't know why this happened last night. Maybe everyone in dormitory went back to their hometown seems like study week just started... hell yeaaahhhh.... I'm freaking out of the middle of night. Later I decided to watch a comedy Korean movie entitled "Baby and Me". Guys... I suggest you to watch this awesome movie. There's a lot things to be learnt from this movie. I think this movie is practically in our daily life especially for those parents to-be. Then I realized it almost 4 a.m and I didn't sleep yet. OMG, it happens again. I have to take the medicine just to make me sleep earlier. It's like drug guys! and I hate it very much because FYI, I am a person who won't take the medicine when I sick. But just in case that if it serious like heavy and extremely sick, then I have to.... (** ouhh that moment.. I feel like... ewww~!!!) and now... this happens again! yeahh.. I meant it... I can't sleep and still writing the entries ... and waiting ... and waiting... tick... tick...

miss my Turkey fellas

Just now, I just commented with Sibel through facebook. She shared me a sweet video of animal concern. How lovely was them. Ouh Dear how I miss my friends in Ankara, Turkey! Truly, deeply and madly missing them... It's almost 4 months I left the beautiful and wonderful place, Turkey. I've learnt a lot there. Meeting cool people there and wordless to say! I put some pictures of them here just in case to look them forward or to glimpse them a while.

We're at Blue Mosque, Istanbul Turkey

At Luna Park, Ankara Turkey where we had fun. Skipping classes!
Awesome!

In class with English Teaching students, Gazii Universitesi, Ankara

Book street, we went shopping along!

I love this picture most!!!
Seriously I miss them a lot!

This beautiful lady is one of my friends in girl dormitory. She's a Cankaya Universitesi and a lawyer to be!
- Kubra -

haaa.. this is Sibel Antly, the one that I've mentioned earlier. She always keep n touch with me. A good friend indeed!

Ohemgee! FYI, I feel like to fly there in this instant. Wanna stay there and meet more cool people there! Seriously I MISS DAMN INFINITELY!

SEVEN PERSONAL QUALITIES

SEVEN PERSONAL QUALITIES FOUND IN A GOOD LEADER

1. A good leader has an exemplary character. It is of utmost importance that a leader is trustworthy to lead others. A leader needs to be trusted and be known to live their life with honestly and integrity. A good leader "walks the talk" and in doing so earns the right to have responsibility for others. True authority is born from respect for the good character and trustworthiness of the person who leads.

2. A good leader is enthusiastic about their work or cause and also about their role as leader. People will respond more openly to a person of passion and dedication. Leaders need to be able to be a source of inspiration, and be a motivator towards the required action or cause. Although the responsibilities and roles of a leader may be different, the leader needs to be seen to be part of the team working towards the goal. This kind of leader will not be afraid to roll up their sleeves and get dirty.

3. A good leader is confident. In order to lead and set direction a leader needs to appear confident as a person and in the leadership role. Such a person inspires confidence in others and draws out the trust and best efforts of the team to complete the task well. A leader who conveys confidence towards the proposed objective inspires the best effort from team members.

4. A leader also needs to function in an orderly and purposeful manner in situations of uncertainty. People look to the leader during times of uncertainty and unfamiliarity and find reassurance and security when the leader portrays confidence and a positive demeanor.

5. Good leaders are tolerant of ambiguity and remain calm, composed and steadfast to the main purpose. Storms, emotions, and crises come and go and a good leader takes these as part of the journey and keeps a cool head.

6. A good leader, as well as keeping the main goal in focus, is able to think analytically. Not only does a good leader view a situation as a whole, but is able to break it down into sub parts for closer inspection. While keeping the goal in view, a good leader can break it down into manageable steps and make progress towards it.

7. A good leader is committed to excellence. Second best does not lead to success. The good leader not only maintains high standards, but also is proactive in raising the bar in order to achieve excellence in all areas.

These seven personal characteristics are foundational to good leadership. Some characteristics may be more naturally present in the personality of a leader. However, each of these characteristics can also be developed and strengthened. A good leader whether they naturally possess these qualities or not, will be diligent to consistently develop and strengthen them in their leadership role. I've discovered few in my personal skills. As I grow older, i have learnt a lot. Difficulties or even obstacles have taught me to be a better person. Maturity is gained towards achieving my goals. All I need to do is doing the best to grab the bright opportunites out there! InsyaAllah...

p/s: Pray for my success one day! <3

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/59305

new one wanted ...

Ok, i think i should buy a new cell phone. Really need new one. Aim to buy the supercool Iphone 4. what a wish, looking forward for a good part time job during upcoming semester break!

Ohemgee~~~ can't wait babeh! -___-

1.1.1.1

#4 love numbers

apa ada dengan satu eyh... Bell pon tatau la. Lately asyik coincidence je nan angka 1. It can be described in many meanings. Well different anticipation from different color of people.
:) smile > current mood.
Even how pathetic my life is currently, Alhamdulillah I can still do everything finely. Not as I wish so, but unless I still learn and improve what ever I face in my daily routines. Perhaps, during my long, tightly-packed schedules. The journey has to go on Bella! Even there's ample of distractions, failure or maybe success!

Back to the numeber... ONE ... wahid (Arabic) ...1
In this month;January or Ocak (Turkish), I played for almost 24/7 with no. 1.

• As I look at my beautiful watch, I saw triple 1 stuck on it (1:11)
• Almost my group for subjects taken in this forth sem are group 1
• Best thing on January,18th 2011... was my 1year 1 month 1week 1 day. What a nice date!

nice one. Always be my baby :)

all memories jumble up again

ni view dari aras 3...

bilik yang agak besar...
menjadi tempat persinggahan kawan2 Bella!
( gossip u ols! )

January 18th...

Malam ni x sangka dapat reunion indirectly ngan ex-classmates 1 H03 (2nd year) Pahang Matriculation batch 2008/2009....

Woww~
bile tengok angka 0809 ... years have been passed by for almost 3 years!
wahh... lame tu!!!
Sekejap je mase berlalu... sape sangka kan... masing2 dah besar... umur semakin meningkat... huk2... kalah air pasang surut u ols....
Luckily, Cik adik Adzna ( yang shumey! ) signed up group utk kelas ni.. hahaha hasilnye..... ape lagi... dapat la kiteorang BERJEJAK KASIH!!!
WALAU JAUH MANE SEKALI PUN... KAN KU TETAP MENJEJAKI U OLSss~!!!

wahahah... motip???
x sampai 1/2 jam da beriban2 komen kat wall post bella... hahah rindu adik2 katenye...
bile ingat2 balik ape yang kiteorang faced together... banya jugak...
di sinilah bermulanya erti BERDIKARI... cz time matrik ni la Bella 1st time duk berjauhan nan mama n ayah... family.... hehehe.... konon nak duk jauh ... hambek ! Pahang nunn... jauh dari my homeland! ( used in Turkey, kalo kat sini=hometown )

Jom, click2 gambar kenangan! :)
Bermula disini....

Classmate: 1 H03
(Life science course, Kmph)

siyes rindu zaman muda2!!!
Year 2009

ni... mase raye kat kolej
curly hair...ouuh~

d'gadis~


time ni Bella agak "techik"
(skang sudah bum3)

lab time!
Biology, which is my favourite subject till now on!

haa.. sian tgk bebek (babies)
lab rats yang dah dipengsankan... huk2

dissect time!!! ( ggrr.... kejam sikit!)

tengok... (kalo gambar ni animated la)
actually, time ni heart tikus ni still pumping...

moment yang paling menyayat hati...
kene bedah jugak tempurung kepala tikus ni...
nipis je kepala die... aduuhhh~~
kene kuarkan pulak otak tikus ni...
toing.. toing...
@__@

bukan senang mau jadi doktor ... itulah yang kite belajar... hati x boleh mudah simpati... kena cekal... hahaha... memang best life as a student ni... kalau diberi peluang... memang Bella nak belajar sampai bile2...

Alhamdulillah... akhirnya UPM (terchinte!!!) tempat Bella menimba ilmu skang ni...
Hahaha... minat yang x terhingga membawa Bell kepada Bacelor Sains (Kepujian) - Major Biologi! hehehe... InsyaAllah Bella akan grad pada 2013 !!!

I never bore to study!
I never let the pain or regret come over when study!
My studies would definitely LAST LONGER!!!

P/s: Kawan2 doakan kejayaan Bella di dunia dan di akhirat yea! In return, same goes to you!
muahh! muaaahH!! sayang u olls!!!

an UPDATE finally!!!

Salam... hye dearies.... lamenye tak update blog.... finally dapat juga bell update blog yg da behabuksSs ni... (nampak x).. Anyhow, Alhamdulillah cz SELAMAT juga bell tiba di Malaysia dengan SELAMATnya... semalam (Selasa, 11 January 2011) flight touch down tepat jam kul 6.48 a.m ( waktu Malaysia OK... haishh gonna miss Ankara and Istanbul LOTSA!!! )
Bile tengok berita pagi semalam... flight salah landed kat Sabah or Serawak ( x sure... kene recheck balik )... bersyukur sangat2 sebab Encik2 Pilot sekalian berjaya mendarat si Putih Malaysia Airlnes;MAS a'plane ... Big and pleasure claps for them after all.

List-to-do:

1. Update "Wrap-up Semester 3"
2. Update "Mobility-Turkey"
3. Update "Birthday siDia"

ahhaa... ade lagi yang perlu di UPDATE kan other than listed above. yeahh.... for sure class2 yang telah terMISSED for TWO WEEKS!!! (wow... banyak u ols!!!!)

OK, to be continued... (Merhabahhh..... gule2... )

A consolation

#3

Remember last few minutes. You asked me to answer your questions. I know you really need the answers. But I can't simply answer that. I don't want to hurt your feels. I hope you understand me baby.

You asked me when will you get all the answers. I will give you when the time has come honey. Just wait for the right time. I am sorry because I have to pretend that I am really2 OK at this time...but the truth, I'm weak. Let the time passes by, until we meet the right day, I will confess everything to you. Just be patient. All I need from you are your faith, loyal and love.

Last question from you before you sleep was, "will you marry me?"

The answer is YES honey. You know how much i meant it . It's just that I can't say the answer on that time. Maybe I overthink about what will happen in next few years. Just pray for the best, honey.

I am happy because you are here, by my side.... :)

f i n a l

berakhirnya kuliah2 n "study week" ...
tibelah... hari2 FINAL....
Ouhhh Goosshh~!!!
nak final ni la kan demam... bkan demam biasa2 lak tuh...
haizzz...
inilah namenye dugaan...
almaklumlah... kalau x de dugaan kite as hambe yang lemah ni... mesti asyik TERLEKA je kan

InsyaAllah...

1. berbekalkan semangat yang kentar...
2. usaha yang lebih
3. doa yang tak putus2
4. tawakal

sumenye boleh kita CAPAI...
just trust urself....Bella...

I know U can do it!!!
hooyehh!!!
kasi semangat sikit...

paper animal biodiversity, BGY3102... selamat diduduki...
malam ni.... paper ecology, BGY3401 lak....

ALL D' BEST ... i'm wishing to all my coursemates!
me too as well!
...
haaa.... paper yang len lak.... right after Raya Haji , damn~~
memang x raye la kan...
hahaha...
x pe...
sikit je lagi bella..
all d best!

to be continued....
toodles~

Dear DIARY

I just woke up ...
It's 10.20 am... Ouh... my FLU is getting WORST~!!!
I can't even breath... ( hidung terSUMBAT~ ...ouh.. ouh... pity me~ )
I can't sleep back also... ( mataku dah MEMBO0LAT o.0 )
ouhhh my.... the weather outside the dorm... damn!!!!!
it's RAINING!!!!!
everyone in this room sleeps very "NYENYAK" !!!
geramnyer~ ggrr~~gggRrr~

Actually it was not my main idea to write this thing...

Yesterday, I were so excited doing this stuff, writing and networking with others
where I were supposed to sleep early cuz I'm not so well.
Boong... Bo0ong...Bo0ong ... Chaa~!!!

OK, my alarm has rang off which
"HE" wanted me to off/shutdown/ stop doing anything that I were on ~!!!

Aargghh~~!!!

Can U imagine when u're so exciting doing your current passion then someone ask to stop, damn feel like to "--------" him off!!!

I thought that I were free to do anything last night cuz he slept earlier. Later on he woke up and asked me to sleep early....
ishh...ishhhh ...ishhh... GERAMNYER~!!!

-P/S: honey, I tau la it's late already... but what to do... I can't sleep la... nak.. nak... ader "wild party " kan.....-

until...
TICK-TOCK-TICK-TOCK.......

At 4.00 am ... early in the morning,
( I da stop ... and shutdown my honey, lubly lappy da pon )

I called him and asked him to sleep too, cuz I'm afraid that he couldn't wake up early this morning ...cz he works today ,
ehh... ehhh... lain plak jadinye..... urghhhh~!!!!

He started NAGGING at me...
ouhh~... ouhh~~~.....ouhhh~
OK, after.. talk... talk... talk .....................
few minutes later I promised him ( like taking oath la plak kan... ouuhh man ... )


+ PROMISES +

1. I promised U to take REALLY GOOD care of my health ( cuz I got heavy, bad FLU last night )
2. I promised U to take care of myself, honey
3. I promised U to SLEEP early unless I have fully recovered!!!

Finally, we both can sleep "tenangly" hahaha after all~~
hehehe.... everything is just FINE this morning... yeay!

P/S: honey, I know how much U're really CARE about me. Thank you honey!!!